How God Blesses Us Through the Curse

We've pretty much all heard the story of Adam and Eve. According to the Bible, these two people sinned and as a result, faced consequences that still affect all of us til this day. Scriptures lays out the specific punishments God gave each of them for disobeying Him and eating from the tree of the knowledge of Good and Evil, even after He instructed them not to.

For the woman, one of these consequences is found at the tail end of Genesis 3:16. Here, God says to Eve, “Your desire will be for your husband, and he [your husband] will rule over you.” This meant that the woman would now have a longing for her husband, and her decisions would always be influenced by that desire. It also meant that in their partnership, her husband would have the final say-so over their decisions together.

With the man, God punished Adam by making it so that the ground would produce thorns and thistles, and the man would have to toil and sweat in order to eat and provide for himself (Genesis 3:17-18). Before, Adam only had to tend to the fruitful garden God had created for him, and he could eat from it freely (Genesis 2:15-16). However, as a result of disobeying God’s instruction to him in Genesis 2:17, God told him that “by the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground.” In other words, he would now have to work in order to get what he needed to survive.

These consequences seem kind of harsh, don’t they? I mean, Adam and Eve ate a little piece of fruit and now, we all have to work 9-5 jobs and swipe left on Tinder until we find the man we're looking for?

To our modern-day minds, what’s laid out in Genesis 3 definitely seems like a curse. However, the good news is that God uses these "curses" to actually work as blessings in the lives of those who seek Him, particularly through a Christ-centered marriage. Let's look at how.

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God’s punishment for woman included that her husband would rule over her — i.e., there would need to be submission.

Submission in marriage is a concept that many people don’t understand, or simply don’t agree with. Therefore, we need to examine how submission in marriage is meant to work.

Most people will willingly submit and allow someone to rule over them as long as they believe that the person in charge is trustworthy. On your job, for example, if you know that your supervisor values what you bring to the table and can be trusted to do what they promise to do, you generally will submit to their rules and authority. On the other hand, if you view your boss as someone who can’t be trusted — as in, someone who doesn’t keep their word and who doesn’t have your best interest at heart — you won’t respect them nor grant them any true authority over you.

It’s a similar principle when it comes to submission between a husband and a wife. A woman willingly allowing her husband to “rule over her,” as talked about in Genesis 3:16, confirms that she trusts in his judgement and abilities, and that she believes he will make decisions that won’t harm her or damage their relationship. Now, if she chooses to submit to a man whom she doesn’t feel she can trust, or if she is forced to submit against her will, then the relationship will be toxic and unfulfilling for both people involved. However, if a man shows that he is a trustworthy and capable leader, and his wife sees this and is willing to step back so that he can lead them both, submission is a beautiful thing.

For men, the kind of respect and trust that submission takes fulfills a deep need that God Himself wired into them. If a man knows that his wife views him as worthy of submitting to, he will strive to reach his greatest potential as a man, husband, father, friend, and leader. This in turn benefits not only the husband and wife, but the entire family and community around them. In that sense, God uses the punishment He gave woman in Genesis 3:16 — that her husband would rule over her — to actually bless mankind.

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God’s punishment for man included that he would have to toil and work hard to provide for himself.

Again, in Genesis 3:17-19, God sentenced Adam to now have to work in order to eat and provide food for himself. We absolutely still see the effects of this today; that’s why we have the saying “If a man don’t work, a man don’t eat.”

Most men actually have a natural drive to work — that is, they are willing to do whatever it takes to get what they want or need. This is regardless of what stage of life they’re in, which career field they choose, or even any physical limitations they may have. Men are expected to put their hand to the plow and get things done, and generally, they have the natural inclination to do so.

That willingness to exert effort and the ability to provide what’s needed are traits that, as women, we are attracted to. Women want a man who understands that he has to work in order to produce results. Furthermore, women want a husband who sees her as worth working and providing for. Why is that? Because a husband’s drive to provide for his wife signifies that he views this woman as an extension of himself. Paul discusses this deeper in Ephesians 5:28-29 when he instructs men to do the following: “Love your wife as your own body. He who loves his wife loves himself.“ Paul goes on to note that a person will love themselves by feeding and caring for their body. Therefore, providing and caring for his wife, just as Christ did for the church, is how a man goes about "loving his wife as he loves himself.”

With that in mind, it makes sense that women want a man who’s not afraid to work hard and put in effort — not just on his job, but in pursuing and taking care of her. Women desire effort, labor, and provision, and that is exactly what God tasked men with after Adam sinned in the Garden of Eden.

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God uses the consequences of Adam and Eve’s actions to bless men and women in marriage — and through marriage, to build families and communities.

Through the punishment God gave Eve in Genesis 3:16, God enables a woman to fulfill her husband’s intrinsic need to be trusted and respected. Through the punishment He gave Adam in Genesis 3:17-19, God uses a man to fulfill his wife’s deep longing to be provided and cared for.  In this, we can see that God has always been an intentional, merciful, and gracious towards mankind.

Notice that in Genesis 3, God curses the serpent (Genesis 3:14), and then curses the ground (Genesis 3:17), but He never directly curses Adam and Eve. Instead, He simply allows them to face the consequences of their actions. He places parameters around what they should do in the future — which is something that any good parent will do so that their child can learn and grow. After that, God gives them the clothing and covering that they now need as a result of their own disobedience (Genesis 3:21).

This is the kind of love that God has for us. Even after we turn away from Him and choose to follow our own ways, He continues to search for us (Genesis 3:9), discipline us like a loving father would (Hebrews 12:6), and then provide for our every need. Even when the enemy deceives us into thinking we know best, just like he did with Adam and Eve, God shows that He is still on our side —and that He is capable of using His chastening for our ultimate benefit.